Lube is love
Here's a riddle: what bodily fluid is more slippery that snot? Mother Nature's most miraculous formula was saved for sex.
Join me for a live Summer to Fall Styling Workshop Wednesday, October 11 (note the new date)! You’ll get tips to remix your wardrobe for fall, create a vision for your style and imprint it into your five senses with one of my favorite coaching practices! And now onto lube is love.
In Ali Wong’s new hit TV show Beef, a few episodes in there’s a steamy bedroom sequence. In it, this gorgeous guy goes down on her and she tells him to spit on it.
Sure, it’s hot to spit on it, though saliva is not a substitute for lube.
One more time for the people in the back!
Saliva is not a substitute for lube.
As a starter, sure. We’re going to need something more slippery for the main course.
So what is lube?
Lube, short for lubrication, is designed to decrease friction and increase pleasure during sex.
A study in 2009 at Indiana University reported that 70% of women ages 18 to 68 reported more pleasurable and enjoyable sex when they used lubrication. (Just in case you didn’t believe me, there you have it.)
I'm a biiiig believer. As a general rule, 99% of my sexual encounters include lube. May the record show. Lube isn’t just for partnered encounters. It’s just as important for solo play.
Let’s track what happens to female genitalia during arousal. Blood flow cause the clitoris and labia to engorge. Two glans secrete lubrication to prepare the vagina for intercourse (or toys).
This miracle of Mother Nature makes women wet.
The clitoris, the crowning jewel of the vulva, has 10,000 nerve endings. (Previously studies reported 8,000 nerve endings, then an Oregon Health & Science University-led study in 2022 upgraded the clit to 10K.) Did I mention that its only purpose is pleasure?
While the vaginal walls secrete lubricant, the clitoris does not. Since most women experience orgasm from clitoral stimulation, not penetration, lube is not a luxury, but a necessity.
(If you run the numbers, about a third of women experience vaginal orgasms from penetration alone. And it often relates to the proximity of the clitoris to the vaginal opening.)
As my friends at Self Serve Toys say, lube is love.
And on the eight day, God said, “Let there be lube on every bedside table.”
Lube makes play more comfortable, it enhances sensation, and there is less of a chance for micro-tears when using lubricant—this lessens the chance for bacteria and STI's which makes sex more pleasant and enjoyable all around.
If you’re in the market for new lube, there are more options than ever before: water based, oil based and silicone based.
Depending on what kind of contraceptive and/or toys you use, this will influence which type of lube you may choose.
Read on for a review of pros and cons of each, plus my personal favorites!