This is such a great read, Sarah. Thank you for your words. Feeling so beautifully and delightfully called out by "I have been the cock block to my own life."
OMG!!!! This was amazing! I related so much, also come from a Catholic background, married at 24 and divorced by 27. I loved the part about being your own cock block. Phew. Been there, done that. Im 35 now and still learning how to five myself what I want: Im loving your blog and Im so excited to be here!
Luna! It's so good to have you here, welcome. Thank you so much for your kind words, I'm so glad that you can relate with your similar background. The point is that you are on the path! It will evolve, you will evolve, your desires will evolve, and all of that is welcome! So glad to be connected with you.
I've been thinking about this exact topic all week after receiving a message implying my Prince Charming will come soon, then I can be happy. I felt angry that somehow getting married is the ultimate end goal according to our patriarchal society. There's no way I will let someone in unless they can add to my life—I'm tired of my energy being taken from me.
I love the line, "When you give to yourself, you are both giver and receiver. You receive the benefits of each."
I can fully give and receive. I'm complete on my own, and if someday someone can add to that it'll be the cherry on top—but it's not the end goal.
Kaitlyn, thank you for sharing your experience here! How funny, the notion that ONCE Prince Charming shows up, THEN you can be happy. As though no happiness could be had without? The patriarchy loves putting us into boxes that are one-size-fits-all, don't they? The stats show that men are often happier in marriage. And unmarried women are happier still.
Relationships as adult women are so different now. Part of me misses the tangle of codependency. And more of me enjoys the fact that if something were to change about my relationship status, I would still have two feet solidly underneath me.
I feel that, Sarah. Part of me also misses the codependency, but I think having our feet solidly underneath us just means it will be that much more sweet if/when we meet the right match. Thank you!!
this is a great piece Sarah. thank you for sharing your experience. and ooooh how many times i've had the disney princess conversation!
I almost got married at 26 to a guy I had been dating since I was 18, and totally relate to that experience of wondering... who will love us now? Gosh i remember the years of grief and desperation... and also not quite having the awareness yet that I could give the love to myself. It was the beginning of a very deep portal of healing.
also, congratulations on your resignation and devotion to this new path!!!
Faye! Such a treat to have you here, thank you for your kind words!
Wow, that sounded like a pivotal relationship in your life. The things we know now that we didn't at the time. It's curious to me how the deepest hurts lead to the deepest healing. Grateful for the silver linings, even when they aren't evident at the time.
Thank you so much for the congrats!!! I couldn't be more thrilled to be on this path!
This is such a great read, Sarah. Thank you for your words. Feeling so beautifully and delightfully called out by "I have been the cock block to my own life."
Giselle, welcome! It's a pleasure to have you here. I laughed out loud when I read your words, so glad to hear that this landed well with you.
OMG!!!! This was amazing! I related so much, also come from a Catholic background, married at 24 and divorced by 27. I loved the part about being your own cock block. Phew. Been there, done that. Im 35 now and still learning how to five myself what I want: Im loving your blog and Im so excited to be here!
Luna! It's so good to have you here, welcome. Thank you so much for your kind words, I'm so glad that you can relate with your similar background. The point is that you are on the path! It will evolve, you will evolve, your desires will evolve, and all of that is welcome! So glad to be connected with you.
Yes. YES!!!!!
Amazing, Déjà Vu! You're accepting the invitation from the universe!
I've been thinking about this exact topic all week after receiving a message implying my Prince Charming will come soon, then I can be happy. I felt angry that somehow getting married is the ultimate end goal according to our patriarchal society. There's no way I will let someone in unless they can add to my life—I'm tired of my energy being taken from me.
I love the line, "When you give to yourself, you are both giver and receiver. You receive the benefits of each."
I can fully give and receive. I'm complete on my own, and if someday someone can add to that it'll be the cherry on top—but it's not the end goal.
Kaitlyn, thank you for sharing your experience here! How funny, the notion that ONCE Prince Charming shows up, THEN you can be happy. As though no happiness could be had without? The patriarchy loves putting us into boxes that are one-size-fits-all, don't they? The stats show that men are often happier in marriage. And unmarried women are happier still.
Relationships as adult women are so different now. Part of me misses the tangle of codependency. And more of me enjoys the fact that if something were to change about my relationship status, I would still have two feet solidly underneath me.
Thank you for adding your voice to the mix!
I feel that, Sarah. Part of me also misses the codependency, but I think having our feet solidly underneath us just means it will be that much more sweet if/when we meet the right match. Thank you!!
this is a great piece Sarah. thank you for sharing your experience. and ooooh how many times i've had the disney princess conversation!
I almost got married at 26 to a guy I had been dating since I was 18, and totally relate to that experience of wondering... who will love us now? Gosh i remember the years of grief and desperation... and also not quite having the awareness yet that I could give the love to myself. It was the beginning of a very deep portal of healing.
also, congratulations on your resignation and devotion to this new path!!!
Faye! Such a treat to have you here, thank you for your kind words!
Wow, that sounded like a pivotal relationship in your life. The things we know now that we didn't at the time. It's curious to me how the deepest hurts lead to the deepest healing. Grateful for the silver linings, even when they aren't evident at the time.
Thank you so much for the congrats!!! I couldn't be more thrilled to be on this path!
This is wonderful to hear! Yes, that cockblock comment is such a vivid one. In what ways do we block our own aliveness, consciously or otherwise?
Alas, religion does get in the way for so many of us! It's an unraveling -- I feel like living proof that it is possible to dispel.